Category Archives: Self love – self hate
Being single shouldn’t feel like punishment, but for black church girls, it often does

How is a church like prison and being incarcerated like belonging to a church? Both have a way of asking,…

Black Father-Daughter Talk

A podcast featuring a 30-something black woman and her dad, talking about life. Click here to listen. (I hadn’t actually made…

Light Women in Yellow

Yellow became my favorite color several years ago because by wearing it, I could prove that my skin is not…

What I’m Still Learning from Prince

I’ve been trying to process why Prince’s death feels so much worse to me than Michael Jackson’s or even Whitney…

Anger is Better

On the Sunday following the Charleston massacre hate crime, those who hadn’t reached the point where they could forgive the…

Two Things about Tipping Points

Someone asked me the following question in a Facebook comment when I posted this article on the similarities between domestic…

I don’t blend in after all

Since I wrote this post, two things have happened: 1. I’ve seen some white people in Trinidad. 2. I’ve been…

An outsider who blends in

Click here to listen to the music with the above photo Update 07/16/2014: I’m having some technical difficulties with the…

The ‘Our’ in #BringBackOurGirls

During my Fulbright-National Geographic application process (from initial decision to apply to outcome), there were three specific times I seriously…

From ‘The American Negro’ to #FeministSelfie and #DangerousBlackKids: Posing African American Humanity Through the Centuries

On Friday my mom and I drove up to the Evansville Museum to see the exhibit, “Posing Beauty in African…

My Best Posts of 2013

I’m a little late on looking back, but I wrote 67 posts in 2013. Here’s my top 10 list of…

The Jesus in Grandmama’s House
Italian Christ

In “The Comfort of a Sweet, Black, Dreadlocked Jesus,” I recalled the image of Jesus Christ as depicted in a painting…

Smiling to False Standards

I recently came across a post on a Facebook page asking women what they didn’t like about themselves when they…

No Country (or graduate degree) for Black Feminists

In a few short months, I’ll have to make a very important decision. I’ll have to write a personal statement…

The Right to Have Standards

“How Promiscuity Is a Form of Self-Mutilation,” the headline read. Since I’m returning to writing a memoir largely about sexuality,…

White Girl Dipped in Chocolate?

Many years ago, my father said that by the time I have children, they’ll be white kids dipped in chocolate….

Silenced No More: The VONA Experience

UPDATE 7/7/2013: People who are better photographers than I am took tons of photos of everyone. Click here to see…

Bridging Feminism’s Gap

I recently received some proof my normal-person job is important. I try to keep my normal-person job (as opposed to…

Why I Rise

Today I’m joining what I hope will be billions of women all over the world in celebrating “One Billion Rising,”…

Why Race Should Matter to Pro-Choice Activists

  As I progress with subsequent drafts of my book, I’ve been meeting with another writer for accountability and feedback….

9 of the Most Memorable Moments for Black Women in 2012

On this last day of 2012, I’m sharing the moments from throughout the year that are most memorable to me…

Promoting Inner Black Beauty

  I was going over a long list of possible topics to blog about when I jumped on Twitter to…

Getting on My Nerves (or why I want to be a fitness inspiration)

I was practically born coordinated. According to my mom, I walked before I crawled, and I tied my shoes at…

Get in the Stirrups and Get Tested

I’m a little late with this, but Saturday, December 1, marked the 25th World AIDS Day. On Monday’s Talk of…

Pretty Biblical

Sometimes I read posts written as responses to something unusual and esoteric written online and wonder how the respondent found…

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